People often assume physical violence when they hear about abuse, but that’s not always the case. Abuse is a pattern of behaviours used to gain or maintain power and control over a partner. No one deserves to experience abuse in any way. Every type of abuse is serious.
Abusive relationships are often very intense. An abuser will most likely be very loving at the start, and shower the partner with compliments, attention, and affection.
Below is 10 signs you’re in a abusive relationship.
Your Opinion is Always Wrong: Everyone is going to be wrong at times, and every couple is going to have their disagreements. However, if the relationship is imbalanced, this could be a sign you are with an abusive partner.
They try to control the people you spend time with: Your partner shouldn’t get in the way of your friendships by constantly criticising the people you choose to spend time with, asking you to cancel plans.
They speak for, or over, you: It’s abusive when they speak over you or for you when out in public, as if you can’t do it on your own.
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Humiliation: Abusers may humiliate, undermine, or embarrass their victim in public or in private. They may call their partner names such ‘worthless’, ‘fat’, ‘stupid’, or ‘disgusting’, and use the vulnerabilities of their victim against them.
Control: An abusive partner may try to control what you wear, eat, or any other aspect of your life, checking your phone and social media, and may even go as far as to demand your passwords.
They text and call you constantly to check in: If communication with your partner starts to feel inescapable and involves repeated questions to know where you are, what you’re doing, and who you’re with, it is abusive.
Less recognised forms of physical abuse: An abuser may put physical restrictions on you, such as refusing to let you leave the house, or preventing you from sleeping, eating, drinking, or washing.
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Jealousy and isolation: As the relationship progresses, your partner may become more jealous and possessive, voicing disapproval over who you can talk to to, or spends time with, discouraging you from seeing friends and family, and accuse you of cheating.
Gaslight: They may use insults as jokes, and make you feel bad for getting upset. Gaslighting can be subtle, and not be noticeable at first but it kills self-esteem.
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