Single mums seem to be skeptical about whether or not to go on dates, if that time is the right time to date, if the coast is clear or not, or if they won’t scare single men away.
But then, being a single mum is no crime. You are actually a very strong and selfless individual that has pledged her allegiance to a precious gift given to you.
It could be stressful getting the right guy to date you because not every guy wants to date a single mum. Perhaps because they are scared of commitment, fathering another man’s child/children, or whatever reasons best known to them.
Regardless, you as a single mum should not give up dating because you have been having bad experiences with men. Dating is inevitable, you’d want to love again and be loved again, so don’t stop trying.
We feel these few tips will help you in your dating journey as a single mum.
1. Wanting to date again might not be all easy or smooth at the start. You might even be uninterested, but ensure you date at your own pace. Do not allow pressure. Be stern and firm with your decision of not wanting to date just yet, but be sure it is not borne out of fear. There will be friends and family members that will be interested in your love life and progress, they will nudge you to go out with someone or meet someone, be sure of what you want want and stand for it.
2. As much as you want to take your time and go at your own pace, ensure you keep an open mind. Be open to meet people even if they are just random people, they could later on form part of your social support circle. Try not to be unnecessarily uptight, be free but don’t let your guard down.
3. Your child/children is your priority, so when you finally decide to date, let them know (provided they are old enough to comprehend such conversation). Discus it with them and also consider their interests. And as soon as you start dating, introduce your date to your child/children.
4. Honesty is very important and essential when it comes to dating. You don’t want to be seen or perceived as a liar. So you need to be upfront about being a single mum. Let them know on the first date if possible. This will help you know if they want to be serious with you or pass. It is actually fair because it will prevent you from leading the other party on.
5. You could try online dating if you’re kinda shy or tired of investing in physical date nights or meet ups. Although there are dark dating sites that is filled with fake personalities or folks interested in sex and not relationships, there are also good dating sites that offers safe, legit and effective services. Online dating sites also gives you the privilege of knowing your potential partner before commitment and to have conversations with them in the comfort of your room.
6. Finally on this note, you need to be prepared and brace up for Mum-shaming. Your decision to date again won’t sit well with some of your friends or family members. But keep in mind that your happiness is key. Do whatever makes you happy.