The shift from dating to getting married is an exciting milestone for couples. Most ladies still dream of the day their bae will get on one knee and say those magical words that will secure their happily ever after dream.
While heathy marriages contribute greatly to a productive community, a toxic one can bring negative effects. It’s definitely better to hold off getting married for some time instead of jumping into something when the red flags are staring right at you.
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You will have dodged many bullets if you pause the wedding arrangements in case you notice any of these red flags:
Everything seems rushed: Usually, there isn’t a specific time frame between courting and getting married. People are different and it’s okay to proceed into marriage when you’re ready.
But, it might seem a bit odd when you meet someone and they’re already pushing to do family introductions and wedding arrangements. Sure, it has worked perfectly well for some couples but it’s still important to get to know the person you intend to spend the rest of your life with.
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It would be unfortunate to go through a nasty divorce a few months of being together solely because you never took time to date properly.
There are deep unresolved issues between you: No relationship is free from struggles. There are seasons where things aren’t okay and times when you’re wondering if it’s just better to move on and start your life all over again.
For any couple to stick together, there needs to be some time for healing. You need to have those uncomfortable conversations and forgive each other fully before you decide to make a big commitment.
If there is still resentment from the past and you choose to get married, it could be the beginning of a dysfunctional marriage.
There is no healthy communication: Communication is the glue of any relationship. You need to learn the elements of healthy communication before you date or at least before you move into marriage because this will save you from a lot of stress.
When a relationship is absent of this, you will keep dealing with miscommunication issues and eventually you won’t know how to handle common disagreements that come up when you’re married.
There is no real connection: These days, marriage isn’t only a sign of true love. There are many people who choose to get marriage for selfish reasons and most of the time things never work out.
If there is a hint that you might not be together for the right reasons, you can expect to have a broken marriage.
Be honest with yourself and also ensure that your partner truly cares about you and you get along well.
Something doesn’t feel right: Sometimes the biggest red flag is that something doesn’t feel right. You will experience a sense of detachment from the moment the proposal happens and your gut will keep telling you that maybe you need to pause a bit.
Your feelings are valid and it wouldn’t hurt to investigate why you’re getting some conflicting feelings.
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