If you have found someone you connect with, you probably don’t want to let the opportunity for love pass you by simply because you two don’t live in the same place. You can still have a healthy, satisfying relationship with someone even if you only see each other a few times a month, a year (or even for years).
Still, being in a long-distance relationship requires work, and you have to take steps to make sure both you and your partner feel connected with one another while not physically together.
1. Communicate As Much (Or As Little) As You Need To Feel Connected
We are living at a time when we have unprecedented round-the-clock access to one another. For those in a long-distance relationship, devoting extensive free time to catching up can be a tremendous gift—so long as you’re both on the same page about it.
Discuss with each other what works for the general frequency and length of time you will spend texting, talking, or video chatting in a day or week. And be open to modifying your communication tendencies as life creates new and unexpected demands.
2. “Be There” Even When You Can’t Actually Be There.
Emotional calls are thousands of tiny attempts to connect with each other. At the core of every emotional call, you’re really asking each other one question: “Will you be there for me?” Responding to each other’s emotional calls can seem tricky within a long-distance relationship. You can’t physically show up for each other’s milestone days or reassure someone with a hug. But that doesn’t make this crucial element of relationship success any less important.
Instead, long-distance couples may need to be more intentional about responding to each other’s attempts to connect. If you’ve scheduled a time to talk with your partner, make that call a priority, just as you would any work meeting or doctor’s appointment. If your partner has an important day, call or text preemptively to find out how it went. By weaving your partner’s needs into your day, you’ll demonstrate that you’re there for them, no matter how far apart you might be.
3. Remind Your Partner Frequently What You Love About Your Relationship
Doubts, insecurities, and jealousy can run high in long-distance relationships simply because you’re spending so much time away from each other. The next time you talk, tell your partner how much you love and appreciate your relationship. And if you’re feeling uncertain about where you stand, don’t be afraid to ask for reassurance for yourself. “I love you and wish we could be together today,” is as wonderful to say as it is to hear.
4. Forge A Secure Attachment By Supporting Each Other’s Interests.
Whether you’re together or far apart, you and your partner will continue to grow and change as life moves forward. That is both normal and a good thing—even if it forces your relationship to change some in the process.
Read also: 5 Tips On How To Maintain A Long Lasting Relationship
Long-distance couples who have a secure attachment together are able to let each other grow and mature. They find ways to stay connected and push each other forward. In a secure attachment relationship, personal growth and change is healthy. It’s a product of security and safety in the relationship. One of the best things you can do to promote a secure attachment is to support your partner as they grow in their individual strengths and interests.
5. Find A Way To Hang Out Together While Apart
Research shows that interdependent relationship is proven to be the healthiest form of relationship for marriage. That means you and your partner do things in sync together while maintaining your own separate identities as individuals. Chances are your long-distance circumstances are forcing you to do more things independently than you would probably like, which is why it’s really important to identify a few activities you can do remotely but together.
6. Learn How To Address Important Issues Both Remotely And In Person
Whether you’re living under the same roof or oceans apart, all couples need to learn healthy ways to talk about and resolve conflicts. Bigger problems can arise if you ignore little struggles or are unwilling to address sensitive topics.
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