As a parent, you want the best for your children. You want them to grow up to be responsible, successful and happy adults. But sometimes, it can be a struggle to figure out the best way to parent your child. You might find yourself feeling frustrated or at a loss for what to do when your child misbehaves. At this point, most parents resort to spanking, name-calling and other forms of punishment.
Here are some tips that will help you raise highly responsible, respectful and successful children without raising a finger on them.
1. Give Your Child Lots Of Nurturing Physical Attention
It seems simple, but children like hugs, cuddles and holding hands. Show them the affection they desire. Know how your child likes to be nurtured and comforted.
2. Offer A Variety Of Activities For Them To Do
Children are more likely to misbehave when they are bored, so provide lots of engaging indoor and outdoor activities for your child such as reading, games, puzzles, science projects, nature walks, blanket tents, etc.
3. Don’t Feed Into Their Emotional Outbursts
If your child misbehaves, stay calm and give them clear instruction to stop misbehaving and tell them what to do instead (e.g. “Stop throwing. Play with the truck on the ground”.) Use specific phrase with your child if they stop. (e.g. “Thank you for playing with the truck on the ground”.)
4. Don’t Forget To Take Care Of Yourself
It is difficult to be a calm, relaxed parent if you are stressed, feeling anxious or down. Try to find time everyday or at least once a week to let yourself unwind or do something that you enjoy.
5. Don’t Forget To Give Your Child Positive Attention
Your children need positive attention. If they do not perceive positive attention from the family, they may choose to seek out negative attention. This is because negative attention is still attention, and to them, any attention is better than being ignored. Remember to communicate with your child. Love and care are the greatest healers.
6. Lead By Example (Model What You Expect)
Think of your children like a copy machine who will mimic everything you do. If you make poor choices in behaviour, you are giving them permission to act in the same ways. Check in with yourself and don’t lose it in front of the children.
7. Have Realistic Expectations
All children misbehave at times and it is inevitable that you will have some discipline challenges. Trying to be the perfect parent and expecting perfectly the behaved child can set you up for frustration and disappointment.
8. Guide Your Child Through Their Mistakes And Weaknesses
Punishing a child is not as effective as using praise and rewards. Rather than focusing on weaknesses, find ways to assist your child in developing to their full potential. When encouraged, children will acquire talents to compensate for any deficiencies.
9. Avoid Negative Emotional Reactions To Your Child’s Behaviour
If your child has problems with control, negative responses like anger, sarcasm and ridicule will only make them feel worse. Use short and mild verbal phrases to remind your child to focus (like “let’s pay attention”).
10. Don’t Ever Give Up On Your Child
All of your child’s problems can be worked through with humour, goodwill and perseverance. With proper parental support, even the most troublesome teens can become amazing people.
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