The teenage years are confusing and difficult years for children and parents alike. However, it is the best period to groom your child the way you want them to turn out. Having a teenager can be frustrating for parents because of their frequent changes in behavior.
Things need not be complicated and there are different ways for you and your teenage child to manage a healthy relationship through mutual respect and love. Hence we have come up with some tips that can help you deal with your teenager.
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Always take a few seconds to remind yourself to stay calm. It can be frustrating when your teenager behaves rudely, but threats and shouting matches will only serve to make matters worse. As the adult, take a step back and ask yourself what your child could have been trying to say. For example, there could have been a point they were unable to express clearly, so think of ways to get them to communicate more effectively. If you find yourself unable to keep your composure, choose to continue the conversation when you feel calmer.
Show interest in their interests
It is important for parents to take an active interest in what their children are doing, and learn more about their interests or hobbies. This is the most direct way to make your teenage child feel that you care, it will also help to create more conversational opportunities for both of you.
Get to know their friends
Your teenager is looking for a place to hang out with their friends. Be a good sport by opening your own home to them. Through this way, you can get to meet and know their friends.
Treat them like a teen, not a child or an adult
Don’t treat your teenager as a small child, because they are not. So it’s important to adjust your expectations and not treat them as a child. However, teens are not quite adults and cannot be held responsible as an adult.
Be flexible with their freedom
If your teen is making an effort and showing their responsibility, allow more freedom. If they are making bad choices, be more restrictive. Ultimately, show them that their behavior gives them freedom or restrictions and their own choices determine their outcomes.
Make them trust you
Gaining trust from a teenager is quite tricky, and we know that teens can get into a lot of trouble, but don’t focus your attention on the bad things they’ve done in the past or the risks they might face. Even if your teen has greatly betrayed your trust, it is important for both of you to repair that trust. If you think your teen may be up to something, have them explain it to you fully. Ask questions instead of jumping to conclusions.
Establish boundaries and stick to them
Your child should know what is expected of them, Set some boundaries around when they can go out, what time they need to come home, and what their role is in the home. Teens will want to push the boundaries, so remain firm when you set a limit.
We all know how stubborn teenagers can be, whenever your teen is involved in something wrong be firm in enforcing consequences, and don’t let your teen sway your decision. When your teenager breaks a rule, calmly tell them what they did and why they are in trouble. When deciding on a consequence, make sure it’s proportional to the behavior and not given out of anger.
Sometimes, your teens may want to prove themselves to you or test their independence in your home. Refuse to fight with them. You can avoid major conflicts by monitoring your own reactions to your teen, even if you think they’re being outrageous. Make sure to always handle any conflict that arises.
Use effective communication
If you keep the lines of communication open, you may help them make positive, informed choices or come to you when they need help. Keep a path of open communication between yourselves whenever possible so they can ask questions, admit mistakes, and reach out when they need help. Instead of jumping to conclusions about your teen’s behavior, ask questions. Try to understand their position without assuming they’ve been doing something wrong.
Be available to them
Teenagers may not always want your physical affection, but they do want your love. Show your love to your teen by being there for them. Don’t just notice their academic achievement or athletic excellence, praise them for who they are as a person and for the traits they possess. Show your love through actions, too. Not all teens want to talk with their parents, but let them know you’re willing to listen.
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